September 28, 2010

Women of Warriors Retreat: Gone to the Horses

~This Weekend was more than I can write in one blog so will be breaking this down into several~

I mentioned in an earlier blog that I was attending a retreat sponsored by Operation Homefront's newest group, Wounded Warrior Wives. The retreat, W.O.W. (Women of Warriors) was held in Tampa, FL and was from Friday til Monday. I was fortunate that I was chosen to go on this trip and actually had reservations about going. It wasn't the "free" trip to Florida because from past Army trips, often times they aren't worth the hassle of flying, getting reimbursed, and the agenda not pertaining to our situation or helping. The retreat was to Quantum Leap Farms which really turned me off because Lord knows, I am more city than country. Therapeutic horses I didn't really think worked, am completely terrified of them to begin with, and the first thing I thought of was I am going to get bit or I am going to be around a TON of horse crap! The newest reservation I had was going with strangers I didn't know save one, and that was Wife of a Wounded Soldier through blogs only. I don't normally shy away from large crowds, and can fit in with others...but the thought of being around women honestly scares me somewhat. I guess it's a female anxiety because most women friends I have encountered in my life are catty, hateful and back stabbing except for a select few. Worries about what my husband would do while I was away, my kids and dealing with my mother in law in the process, I really did go back and forth on making my final decision. I am surprised that I actually got on the plane......

I am so glad I did.

September 3, 2010

My Scream List

I really don't know what is wrong with me this week but, I have been in a foul mood every single morning I wake up. A ton of things are bothering me and I just feel the need to get them out of my head and try to move on. So rather than being long winded and probably boring some of you, I am going to make myself a "Scream List"

  • I am tired, bone tired, and soul weary....So very tired that I can't get my brain to function correctly. I am getting less and less sleep, while my husband has done nothing BUT sleep for the past four days and sleeps all the time. His snoring is driving me insane, his CPAP machine for his unhuman like snoring helps, but now he is mumbling and even humming. Regardless of medications to knock him into a comatose state, he still suffers horribly from night sweats. This in turn makes him toss and turn, which leaves me to the edge of my side of the bed holding on for dear life and HOT. Knowing that he kept me up all night long, and after dealing with the kids and sickness, you would have thought I could have laid down during the day to rest. NOPE.