The deep fractured fissures of the traumatic subjugated mind lay unrest. A coiled wrath waiting seemingly without care to unleash on what may not be there. Reacting without interacting racing and straining the rigors of rationalities foregoing the fulcrum of lucidity and stupidity. Reacting without reason the reflexive trigger rigorously ripping tripping and stripping the underneath (Father Has Passed as Has the Past).
Survival depends on a reactionary responsive reflex, a instantaneous engagement of life threatening situations (No Offense to Our Veterans?).
With the unprecedented levels of sustained combat and extended multiple tours our veterans will be facing the crippling effects of PTSD with their families as well as the public with generational consequences (Mental Health Field Unprepared for Epidemic of PTSD).
It was surreal, beautiful, terrifying, the most intense fireworks I had ever seen filling the entire sky illuminating the battlefield, I was in awe. It felt like I was one with the universe, out among the everything, feeling all and knowing all. I heard over the distance of what seemed like eternity, "Move out" (Dissociative Fugues).
Now that being said, I know a guy that did 5 tours in Vietnam which was uncommon, most soldiers did their two years and the ones that survived went home (Iraqi War Mental Health Epidemic).
I kept thinking of killing myself for 15 years or so, driving off the road, instigating fights, fingering my gun and imaging the relief I would feel if I just pulled the trigger (Never Give in to the Enemy).
A fight, it didn't matter who, what, when or where, just give me that respite despite the spite. I kept plunging deeper dredging in demoralization stumbling into madness seeing only with my corrupted sight (Vision of Unrest).
So, I go forward because my balance depends on foiling the fall backwards. OK, OK stop it!…My mind goes into these circles of creativity circulating the circumference of creation (Responsibilities, Relationships, Compulsions and Convictions).
In his last speech Dr. King talked of the threats against his life, without saying the words he found forgiveness for his fellow brother who snuffed his life (Dr. King’s Light and My Emergence).
In a battle with no solid enemy and no apparent battleground the warrior having been trained to combat the physical comes in contact with a foe that can over shadow the imagination (PTSD, Combat and the Guilt of a Nation Mediated by the Media’s Lip Service).